is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
