I must be too annoying 4 u.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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