i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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