Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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