Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
