Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
