He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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