Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
