Texts From Last Night

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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.

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  (832): I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store. http://tfl.nu/hql1
  Replies (14) Good night (1485) Bad night (644)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.

  (1-416): View more from Ontario

  u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u

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  (416): I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck. (1-416): u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u http://tfl.nu/rica
  Replies (16) Good night (1291) Bad night (3902)
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  (661): View more from California

  Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.

  (1-661): View more from California

  Lol thats a classic

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  (661): Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me. (1-661): Lol thats a classic http://tfl.nu/zpo3
  Replies (31) Good night (5201) Bad night (964)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.

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  (516): Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning. http://tfl.nu/lzds
  Replies (15) Good night (822) Bad night (5396)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker

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  (313): Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker http://tfl.nu/hydd
  Replies (12) Good night (3051) Bad night (2843)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.

  (1-651): View more from Minnesota

  She still started it.

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  (651): No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister. (1-651): She still started it. http://tfl.nu/h5sx
  Replies (7) Good night (2950) Bad night (1049)
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  (310): View more from California

  I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*

  (310): View more from California

  Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.

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  (310): I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.* (310): Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche. http://tfl.nu/gxdj
  Replies (12) Good night (3021) Bad night (857)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.

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  (239): I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life. http://tfl.nu/rpst
  Replies (1) Good night (1292) Bad night (706)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.

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  (519): Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar. http://tfl.nu/0nuz
  Replies (2) Good night (1540) Bad night (1210)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.

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  (248): Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/ylim
  Replies (3) Good night (1342) Bad night (626)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.

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  (513): While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from. http://tfl.nu/e26m
  Replies (12) Good night (967) Bad night (1108)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  It's blow job season.

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  (515): It's blow job season. http://tfl.nu/1yxc
  Replies (51) Good night (1746) Bad night (580)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.

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  (407): What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats. http://tfl.nu/w4l0
  Replies (1) Good night (931) Bad night (531)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?

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  (217): Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter? http://tfl.nu/zu2a
  Replies (0) Good night (563) Bad night (346)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.

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  (810): He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day. http://tfl.nu/wsn6
  Replies (0) Good night (338) Bad night (280)

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