Texts From Last Night

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  (424): View more from California

  you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain

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  (424): you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain http://tfl.nu/zpba
  Replies (3) Good night (715) Bad night (1569) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"

  (571): View more from Virginia

  you make me proud to be your friend

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  (703): Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe" (571): you make me proud to be your friend http://tfl.nu/nyf8
  Replies (65) Good night (4663) Bad night (532)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...

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  (704): so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie... http://tfl.nu/pw66
  Replies (40) Good night (1185) Bad night (5856) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.

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  (301): he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party. http://tfl.nu/uacy
  Replies (15) Good night (3882) Bad night (1054) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?

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  (503): They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that? http://tfl.nu/8vi3
  Replies (6) Good night (2824) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.

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  (608): Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college. http://tfl.nu/sy1r
  Replies (19) Good night (4056) Bad night (1072) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.

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  (518): I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved. http://tfl.nu/p0e0
  Replies (11) Good night (2133) Bad night (954) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"

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  (740): I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots" http://tfl.nu/pkth
  Replies (12) Good night (5052) Bad night (672) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.

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  (623): Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that. http://tfl.nu/xmai
  Replies (10) Good night (826) Bad night (517) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person

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  (845): Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person http://tfl.nu/riak
  Replies (15) Good night (1639) Bad night (429) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?

  (1-270): View more from Kentucky

  It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.

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  (270): I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right? (1-270): It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking. http://tfl.nu/u0kh
  Replies (5) Good night (1446) Bad night (244)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors

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  (269): You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors http://tfl.nu/85u5
  Replies (3) Good night (372) Bad night (598) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...

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  (416): Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list... http://tfl.nu/tcm7
  Replies (3) Good night (440) Bad night (239) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed

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  (209): I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed http://tfl.nu/bw7g
  Replies (0) Good night (307) Bad night (163) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.

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  (406): I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever. http://tfl.nu/7tpa
  Replies (1) Good night (351) Bad night (158) Order T-Shirt

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