New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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