I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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