You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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