remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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