I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize