What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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