She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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