the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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