Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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