Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
