I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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