dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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