She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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