Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
