He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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