He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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