That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
