Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Randomize