Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
