So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
