porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
