i jhust puked up my retainher.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I just want nice things and good sex
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
