no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
