I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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