Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
