Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
