I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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