Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Randomize