You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
