Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Randomize
