I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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