Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?