In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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