i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
