is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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