mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
