Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum

  (212): View more from New York

  i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls

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  (212): her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum (212): i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls http://tfl.nu/3qj9
  Replies (8) Good night (891) Bad night (1427)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.

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  (954): God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through. http://tfl.nu/ylm6
  Replies (28) Good night (764) Bad night (4355)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.

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  (410): this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it. http://tfl.nu/bnad
  Replies (25) Good night (4347) Bad night (773)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on

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  (817): idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on http://tfl.nu/4tgi
  Replies (10) Good night (3448) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere

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  (203): Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere http://tfl.nu/w3xh
  Replies (11) Good night (1528) Bad night (3490)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.

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  (410): As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned. http://tfl.nu/df4g
  Replies (19) Good night (5933) Bad night (954)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.

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  (443): She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals. http://tfl.nu/esz5
  Replies (14) Good night (2704) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt

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  (630): I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt http://tfl.nu/jrki
  Replies (10) Good night (2935) Bad night (692)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.

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  (513): We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game. http://tfl.nu/pari
  Replies (22) Good night (2463) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel

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  (201): I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel http://tfl.nu/tjoe
  Replies (8) Good night (2768) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Omg sara

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty

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  (920): I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3 (906): Omg sara (920): I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty http://tfl.nu/fytc
  Replies (8) Good night (1591) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.

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  (901): A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird. http://tfl.nu/mrcn
  Replies (10) Good night (1271) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.

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  (416): Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes. http://tfl.nu/v9h7
  Replies (1) Good night (761) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...

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  (803): He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation... http://tfl.nu/sr4l
  Replies (0) Good night (572) Bad night (254)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.

  (1-843): View more from South Carolina

  My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.

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  (843): But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public. (1-843): My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly. http://tfl.nu/3lc6
  Replies (2) Good night (608) Bad night (173)

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