Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?

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  (818): Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess? http://tfl.nu/uim6
  Replies (5) Good night (902) Bad night (453)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I faked an abortion last night.

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  (914): I faked an abortion last night. http://tfl.nu/q8tt
  Replies (20) Good night (692) Bad night (2714)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  She'll never know what hit her

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.

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  (703): She'll never know what hit her (1-703): I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact. http://tfl.nu/fbuf
  Replies (2) Good night (1721) Bad night (576)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother

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  (561): As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother http://tfl.nu/1acl
  Replies (21) Good night (2183) Bad night (518)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.

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  (206): Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun. http://tfl.nu/3gwj
  Replies (39) Good night (11742) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again

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  (814): I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again http://tfl.nu/580i
  Replies (12) Good night (3074) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?

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  (919): Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus? http://tfl.nu/9yje
  Replies (22) Good night (783) Bad night (4024)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.

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  (678): Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college. http://tfl.nu/311k
  Replies (6) Good night (2489) Bad night (974)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice

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  (313): Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice http://tfl.nu/wuko
  Replies (11) Good night (3245) Bad night (947)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.

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  (484): She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that. http://tfl.nu/ceu5
  Replies (24) Good night (4417) Bad night (1290)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?

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  (614): This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off? http://tfl.nu/dr6k
  Replies (10) Good night (1368) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars

  (1-252): View more from North Carolina

  I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers

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  (252): I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars (1-252): I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers http://tfl.nu/w67j
  Replies (6) Good night (2002) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.

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  (603): He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss. http://tfl.nu/zi8c
  Replies (3) Good night (643) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.

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  (765): If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself. http://tfl.nu/9sig
  Replies (0) Good night (290) Bad night (138)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice

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  (716): I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice http://tfl.nu/9xrw
  Replies (1) Good night (419) Bad night (170)

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