Hey man sorry I got all grabby
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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