My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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