i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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