Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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