Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
